stellar moment monday

today started with some school. about ten minutes later, continued with an angry outburst (me then him), tears, prayer, tickling, laughter and kisses. in that order. then school proceeded. trying to figure out what is realistic expectations for this 4 year old. so many ideas in my head of what i'd love to do, but really what is realistic, what can he take. also trying to figure out creative ways, hands on games, activities of teaching stuff. he loves youtube videos of stuff we're learning, so that's been good. just in general trying to figure out how to lay out the week... we are gone so much of the week and i'm not sure i want to cut any of that out especially to keep him/us in others' lives. but want to make the most of school time at home, too. but ahhh yes, he's 4. reading "How do i stop losing it with my kids? Getting to the heart of your discipline problems" put out by CCEF. good stuff. he's definitely not a discipline problem, but I am. i mean sure, he whines and loses interest, will get impatient, but how much am I to expect? so, that's where I'm at. no answers here, just questions, but good ones to struggle through. our little homeschool project this week is: my heart.

thoughts

--tuesdays are now exploration tuesdays, for field trips, nature walks, outings with special homeschooling friends, phew; we just needed to make that official
--i'm surviving on the library, book lists, and post it notes (more favorite books to come)
--i stink at art/crafts
--Levi is super good at memory work but is at times hard to motivate (lolly pops, raisins are good things and i claim that bribing is not bad thanks to my sister in law megan)
--someone is learning to color in the lines, sort of; but della still likes to color more than he does (she's been sitting here next to me coloring for about 30 minutes, no joke)
--my daughter is apparently being homeschooled too (wasn't planning that one)
--i love yard sales for those old, classic books for a dime each
--i need to wake up early every day--before the kids--but i'm not

it's starting

i'm barely homeschooling my 4 year old son, but it's official enough i suppose. we do a coop once a week, work on prehandwriting activities, read a ton of books, play games, do simple worksheets together, whatever. he's 4. over the past 3 weeks i've had SO many people ask me if Levi is going to preschool this year and i've had to fess up that he's not, that he's staying at home with us. i've started to experience the spectrum of reactions ranging from excitement (not very often) to that look that feels like (at least to me) someone is trying to mask their reservation and skepticism. maybe i misjudge. i don't want to struggle with what others are thinking about this decision, but i am! i was getting used to it, but now i'm not again. with each new person who asks and i inform, i am beginning to feel more insecure on how to explain what we're doing and why we are doing it. like, why do i have to explain, anyways? probably for my own sake. in due time, it will settle in and all feel normal. but by the way, it's been the best thing for us as a family to do this together. and i'm actually enjoying it.

tomorrow is 35

I'm a little down thinking about 35. Don't know why. Spent most of my day today with just the kids, and that was.... hard. They were fine, nothing spectacularly different than any other day. Just needing some time, but, again, not sure why. In addition to having this new office, I have a new bathtub, and I think I am planning on using it tonight for the first time. I miss baths...

Craving a little order to my day, can't quite seem to find that with my two yahoos. Anyways, I think I'm going to take them to Fairmount Park tomorrow, needing some woods time. Even though it might rain, but we might risk it. Time for a little nature :)

Weirdest thing about 35? Halfway between 35 and 40 (obviously), but it just feels different. Best thing about 35? Feeling a little more prone to do what I'm really wanting to try despite the naysayers around (or even the naysayer inside, at times). Happy Birthday to Me. And now it's bath and book time..... goodnight

new office, new life

I know, I know, it's not that life giving... and yet it really is. Having a place of my own--to sit and read and write and well, maybe even start a hobby some day--is quite a thrill. It used to be Della's room, but now it's my office. She's upstairs with brother on the third floor. With the second floor bathroom redone (thank you God) we just feel like a whole new family. It's like a breath of fresh air. And now I feel like I have a place to think. Now if I only could find the time... O well, it'll come. Maybe you'll see an occasional blog post here now, not that anyone checks anymore (see, I can always make a little time to be passive aggressive).

welcome november

So I'm not going to write about how Levi skipped a nap yesterday and we put him to bed in hopes that he would sleep in a little this am for daylight savings, and how he woke up around 5am hungry (he didn't like dinner last night---you no like? you no eat.)... and i'm not going to write about how Delaney's upper right tooth is just seconds away from bursting through so you know what that means Moms... she actually slept better than her brother, however. And I'm not going to write about how trick or treating brought home a bag full of future cavities, but it was so much more fun than last year. We are trying to blow some time before church, since this morning feels EXTRA LONG.

Here is what Levi wants to write:
Dear Levi, We love you. I love drums. I love cymbals. Um, I love tambourines. I love Frank. I love to play the drums. Um, Here is my pumpkin I just picked. Ummm, I love you Jesus. I love Mommy. And I love Delaney. And I love Daddy to play with me. And umm I love to play with Ben and Elijah and Carter and I love to play with Ethan and kitty cat (?) and letters and um numbers and cooos and q's and....

Now he's getting silly. But that is Levi's post. I think he has a blog post confused with a prayer. Or maybe not. Isn't all of life prayer? He's just superspiritual.

playing after bath ritual

This is a longish video, but it's to document how we end our days. It makes me smile every night. Sorry about the "flash". They are so sweet together, this doesn't even really capture it. But then again, Delaney is not crawling yet, so we'll see about life then.